


This Hope is Treacherous

by thorbiased



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bruce Banner Is a Good Bro, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, He’s just hopeful, The team is all together, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 19:28:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15541350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thorbiased/pseuds/thorbiased
Summary: Thor knew deep down that he needed to stop this. That this was denial and this was not healthy and Loki would not want this for him. And yet he did it again. And again. And again. He found little green birds, snakes, and all sorts of creatures. He brought them to Bruce, who tested them patiently and informed him with pain in his brown eyes that it was once again not Loki.





	This Hope is Treacherous

**Author's Note:**

> This is the obligatory “Thor brings green animals to Bruce because he thinks they’re Loki” fic that I wrote back when this was still a popular topic lol. As always, please comment!

Thor kept his curtains open, letting either sunshine or moonlight depending on the time of day into his bedroom. It reminded him of Asgard, where balconies were commonplace and most of the lighting was natural. There was something comforting about having the stars watching over him as he slept. It was something he'd loved as a child, and he saw no need to stop now. 

One particular night after a battle, Thor had practically collapsed back into his room, covered in burns and scrapes from creatures escaped from a seemingly abandoned lab in the middle of nowhere. He reached up to unclip his cape from his shoulders, staring out of the window idly as he did. The sun must have gone down on the ride back, as it was shining when they left. He mapped the stars that peeked out from behind the trees. A smile found his lips. It was peacefully beautiful, and peace was so scarce these days. 

Something caught Thor's eye. In the corner of the window, a small green lizard rested on the glass. Thor wrinkled his brow and stepped forward. His cape fell to the ground behind him. He slowly pushed the window open, careful not to disturb the tiny reptile. He reached out and plucked it from its resting place with a smile. 

"Hello, little lizard," he greeted. Hope fluttered in his heart. Foolish, foolish hope. A memory surfaced in the back of his mind, of a young Loki practicing his shape shifting magic. He had turned into all sorts of different animals. Small birds, frogs, snakes, and lizards. 

Thor turned away from the window with the lizard cradled in his hands. "Come on," he said, carrying him to the door. He opened it and headed into the hallway, a destination in mind. 

Thankfully, no one had been seriously injured in the day's battle, so Banner was free. Thor hated to wake him, as he was surely exhausted after a code green, but that stupid hope was whispering in the back of his mind. If his brother was truly alive, then Thor couldn't waste another second getting him back. 

Bruce's door wasn't locked when Thor tried it, but he knocked anyway. To his surprise, Bruce opened the door almost immediately, and he didn't look like he'd been sleeping. The doctor's brows furrowed. 

"Thor?" he asked, giving the god a concerned once-over, "What's wrong?"

Thor held out his hands. "I need your help," he said, opening his cupped palms to show Bruce the small lizard in his hands. His heart was pounding. He just realized how foolish his request was. "Uh...I...think it's Loki."

Bruce's eyes softened in sympathy. He looked down at the reptile in his friend's large hands. "Okay. Let's go to the lab," he said with a nod. 

Thor broke into a grin. He stepped back and let Bruce lead the way to the elevator. They rode down to the lab, which was located underneath the compound itself, in a comfortable silence. Thor gently petted the lizard in his hands, wanting to keep it comfortable, even if it turned out to not be his brother. He let the creature roam over his fingers and up his forearm, a warm smile on his lips. 

The elevator dinged, and the doors slid open, revealing the inside of Tony and Bruce's shared lab. They halved it down the middle, and it was evident in the way the two sides of the lab were organized. On Stark's, equipment and blueprints were scattered around with little to no order, but on Banner's, everything was neat and things were easy to find. 

"Put it on the table over there," Bruce said, pointing to the white-paper covered examination table near the back of the lab. Thor obeyed his friend's orders and set the lizard on the table. He stood back and watched Bruce expectantly, his hands clasped in front of him like a child eager for his mother to hand over a batter-covered spoon. 

Bruce grabbed a few instruments that Thor wouldn't pretend to know the use of. Thankfully none of them looked painful. Bruce knelt in front of the table and ran a gentle finger over the back of the lizard. 

"Hey," he said softly, "if you're in there, Loki, I'm gonna run a few tests. If you'd rather not do that, you could just come out right now."

Thor held his breath and rubbed his thumb against his palm. He willed his brother to transform, to reveal himself with a cocky grin and a sassy quip. Thor finally allowed himself to acknowledge his pain, how much he missed Loki. Up until then, he'd just been pushing it down. 

When Loki did not emerge, Bruce ran his tests. Finally, he sighed and looked up at Thor with sad eyes. "I'm sorry, Thor."

Thor forced a smile, then scooped the lizard up. "It's alright," he said, trying desperately to keep his disappointment out his voice. "It was silly anyway." Without another word, he carried the little lizard outside and set it down in the grass. With tears in his eyes, he watched it scramble away. 

-£-

Thor didn't mean for it to happen again, truly he didn't. And yet, one day, he stood outside the door with Wanda, coming back from the library with their books in the latter's arms. The little witch jumped back with a yelp, staring up at the door. Thor frowned and followed her line of vision to see a tiny green frog perched above the door. Thor gasped and rushed forward, reaching out to grab the frog. 

"Why do you want that?" Wanda asked, peering at him in confusion. 

Thor brushed the frog into his palm and cupped his other hand over the top of it. "It's a frog," he said, by way of explanation. He brought his hands down to his chest and turned back to her, smiling. 

Wanda stared at him, disgusted by the slimy creature in his hands. "You have fun with it. Keep it away from me," she said, shivering. She opened the door, cradling the books in one arm. 

Thor followed her and rushed straight to Bruce's lab. He rode the elevator down, studying the frog in his hands. It hopped around in his hands, trapped by Thor's fingers. Thor frowned. 

"Come on, Loki," he whispered. He cursed his own stupid hopeful nature, his naivety. Of course this frog wasn't his brother. His brother was—

The elevator doors opened with a ding, reducing Thor's rare pessimistic thoughts to dust. A smile came to his face, and he burst through the doors. "Banner!" he called. 

Bruce's head snapped up. He smiled. "Hey, Thor."

Tony was in the lab, too, standing on his table and tinkering with what must have been mark 56 by now. He had a screwdriver in the armor's neck, driving it deeper with a grunt. "What's up, one-eyed Willy?" he greeted. 

Thor tilted his head. "Is everything alright, Stark?" 

Tony nodded, despite the fact that he was now growling at the armor and jamming the screwdriver further still into the armor.

Thor gave him a wary look. "Okay," he said. He turned to Bruce and walked over to his friend's side of the lab, holding out his hands. "I found a frog."

Bruce's eyes fell to the amphibian in Thor's hands. Thor ignored the barely contained heartache on Bruce's face and plopped the frog on the table. 

"Could you check for Loki?" he asked, tears brimming on his lashes. He wanted it to be his brother so badly that he could feel a physical pain in his chest. 

Bruce nodded lifted the frog into the air, giving it a stern look. The frog croaked unhappily. "Loki, if it's you, it'd be a whole lot easier for you to come out now."

Thor's heart was thumping loudly. He wondered if Bruce could hear it. 

Bruce sighed when nothing happened. He sat the frog down again, keeping his thumb over its back. He ran his tests, with Thor watching with tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. Oh, how his heart was breaking. 

Thor nearly broke down when Bruce slowly shook his head. With every last ounce of gentleness left in his body, Thor took the frog into his hands. He thanked Bruce in a tiny, shattered voice and hurried back into the elevator.

-£-

Thor knew deep down that he needed to stop this. That this was denial and this was not healthy and Loki would not want this for him. And yet he did it again. And again. And again. He found little green birds, snakes, and all sorts of creatures. He brought them to Bruce, who tested them patiently and informed him with pain in his brown eyes that it was once again not Loki. 

"I'm sorry, Thor."

"Negative."

"Maybe next time."

He was doing it to himself, which hurt the most. All he had to do was stop, and the pain would go away, but like a curious child playing with a hot stove, he couldn't. Over and over. Again and again. 

-£-

Thor jumped when he saw the little black kitten outside of the compound. Its tail flicked back and forth and it peered up at him with startling blue eyes. Thor smiled softly at it and knelt down, halfway expecting it to scurry away. His smile widened when it stayed. 

"Hello," he whispered. His voice cracked. He held out his hand, and the kitten crept up to sniff his fingers. He brushed his thumb over its head. The kitten sunk its teeth into the pad of his thumb, and he yelped and jumped away. 

"That was not very nice," he scolded. The kitten's eyes danced with mischief. His traitorous heart fluttered with hope. It was not his brother. It wasn't. 

But what if it was? 

"Loki, I swear to Valhalla if it's you..."

The kitten meowed and sauntered closer to Thor, rubbing its head against his arm in a sort of apology. Apologizing for the bite or perhaps for not being Loki. 

Grief crashed over Thor like an unforeseen wave, knocking him to the ocean floor and pounding him down. A sob bubbled up his throat. The kitten meowed sadly. Thor fell back and sat on the ground. Storm clouds gathered in the sky as he wept. The cat hopped up into his lap. Thor wrapped his arms around it, and was grateful when it pressed itself against his chest, purring. 

He sat there in the grass, his back pressed against the wall of the compound, cradling the cat and sobbing. He couldn't explain why the little creature had caused this. 

Wind whipped around him, pulling him back to his senses. In his tears, he guessed he hadn't noticed the pouring rain forming a ring around him and the kitten. He sighed and wiped his eyes, then told the storm to cease. 

"I'm sorry," he told the kitten, sniffing. He coughed. "Do you want to go inside?"

The kitten, of course, said nothing, but Thor carried it inside the compound anyway. He ignored the looks of concern from Sam and Steve, who sat on the couch playing Mario Kart, and smiled at them. 

"Hello. I found a kitten." He held up the cat for them to see. 

Sam's brows furrowed. The game paused on the screen. Thor wondered if Bruce had told them about his searching or they had just noticed his puffy eyes and the storm. 

"Are you okay, Thor?" he asked. 

Thor sniffed again, but nodded. "I am," he said truthfully. Because he was okay, or he would be. His brother was gone. He'd accepted that, as hard as had been to do, he'd accepted that. 

The kitten meowed again and snuggled closer to Thor's chest, resting its chin on his collarbone. It stared up adoringly, purring like a motorboat. 

Yeah, he was okay.


End file.
